in the kind of hip party/restaurant zone near my house
and o! did she look totally, completely, and utterly miserable.she looked SOOOO unhappy that i laughed a little, but she didn't notice because she was not gonna look up from her scuffed converses for anything.
i got my first random response to a blog.
it kind of freaked me out, but i knew it was inevitable.
but to the poster, if he's still out there,
my culture shock is about the foreigner culture more than the korean culture!
my woes are generally more fellow foreigner-related
because i feel like i should understand them and sometimes i just totally don't.
i haven't been culture shocked by much here.
in fact, i really feel comfortable with the korean culture i've been exposed to so far.
i know it's only a glimpse into a window of korean life, but i haven't really been freaked out or disgusted or repulsed by anything! quite the opposite!
the only thing i have a hard time with sometimes
are korean ideas about gender and sexuality.
like that most women (and men) shower both immediately before and after sex because not only is the body naturally dirty and smelly and gross, but sex is dirty and shameful as well.
also, a few days ago i learned about "bamboo wives."
a shape and size somewhat like a woman, a man will wrap around the bamboo wife in the summer while his actual wife lies off on the edge of the bed. snugglin with the bamboo wife keeps him cooler than spooning with his real wife.
while not really in fashion now with the younger generation, people still use bamboo wives and you can get them easily, like at the korean equivalent of target.
i'm cool with most culture difference and i respect them even when they seem a bit extreme - like the obsession with appearance, the needs for intense privacy and saving face, and the countless other generally conservative values. for example, no one kisses in public, so i don't try to give my boy a peck goodbye or anything even though a handclasp seems oddly formal. no biggee. i try to mostly adapt to the korean way of doing things. and it's really not a hardship or anything - i'm basically a guest in this country and i want to be respectful. and anyway, it's all part of the experience. i'm not the kind of girl who ever turns her nose up at something because it's different.
BUT,
some things about gender relations do bother me, but i just don't have to really be a part of that. i don't have to ask my boyfriend to buy me designer clothes and i don't have to put on a weird spoiled little girl act for his ever-patronizing sake. no thanks. i'm so glad i'm dating a weirdo liberally-minded korean.
yay!
2 comments:
I didn't mean to surprise you with a random comment, but I think it's safe to say that I won't be the last person to stumble across your blog. When I'm interested in moving to a new area, I do a lot of "research" through reading blogger impressions of the area. Unfortunately, there's not a lot on Ilsan it would seem.
Anyway, I've been doing this blogging deal since July 2005 when I first moved to Japan to work, and continued it in 2006 and 2007 when I was living in Korea. There are some back posts about my time in Korea if you're interested, but I don't have any foreigner stories that would help you out, unfortunately.
http://victorymanual.com/
For what it's worth, my wife has changed for the better since we've been married, and she's not the "typical Korean" you describe here (bashful in public, etc.). I think society is changing, but you've caught it in the beginning stages. If you're interested in reading some more about sex-roles in society, there is another great blog written by an expat grad student in Korea, and that's specifically his area of study:
http://thegrandnarrative.wordpress.com/
Since Kristen left, I am bored and need a job. I was thinking about wearing a hotdog suit, but I'm gonna switch to the sandwich board thing now. Thanks for the suggestion.
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